Feminist Friday: Some Vampires Are Not For Kids

 Disclaimer: I have read the first 3 Twilight books, and seen the first 3 movies.  I have a general idea of what happens in the last book, but I've never read it.

     Unless you've been living under a rock for the past 7 years, you've heard of the Twilight Franchise and have maybe even read one of the books or seen a few of the movies.  There is no doubt that these books and films have been everywhere since their release and, to be frank, it's getting a little sickening.  The first Twilight book hit No. 1 on the New York Times best seller list the year it was released, and was named one of Publishers Weekly's Best Children's Books of 2005.  The movie based on the novel was the most purchased DVD the year it came out and made $392 million worldwide.

     Let me start out by saying that I have no problem with Twilight as a novel or as a film (thought my inner feminist definitely does).  My biggest issue is that it is being marketed toward children.  If you go to a book store you will find Twilight either in the Young Adult section or in the Children's section.  I can't even begin to tell you how much that infuriates me.  The book itself isn't written very well, but it's a fine book.  For adults.  Who are capable of making decisions.  It is not an appropriate book for impressionable children or preteens looking for role models.

     Reasons Why Twilight Should NOT Be A Children's Book

• The Main Character Has No Flaws

• • Seriously.  Bella Swan is written as the ideal human being.  With the exception of her being a little bit clumsy sometimes, Bella is perfect.  She is beautiful and kind and smart and all of the boys in the school are in love with her.  Before she's even been attending this high school for two months, she has four men fawning over her.  She cleans and cooks for her dad, who spends his time looking at his guns, and generally doesn't make any decisions for herself.  Both unrealistic and unrelatable.

• Bella Cannot Function Without Her Man

• • In New Moon, the second book in the series, Edward leaves Bella, for her own good (because he knows what's best for her.  I'll get into that later).  Bella is completely devastated  and can no longer function in everyday life. She completely decomposes and only starts getting better once she befriends Jacob, the werewolf who often doesn't wear a shirt.  Is that the kind of message we want to send young girls?  If your boyfriend leaves you, you should probably just stop trying in life until you find a new one.

• Edward Stalks Bella and Controls What She Does

• • Edward actually climbs into Bella's bedroom window, before they've even actually had a conversation together, and watches her sleep.  Really.  He also follows her around when she goes out with her friends, and continuously doesn't listen to her feelings and concerns.  If anyone snuck into my bedroom window in the middle of the night, sexy vampire or not,
    I would definitely call the police.  He treats her like an idiot for most of the first film (and while she might be, it's still not okay) and constantly makes decisions for her.

• Edward is the Prime Example of an Abusive Boyfriend

• • Really, if I had to pick one issue with this series it's that Edward is abusive.  One hundred percent.  He follows Bella around, tells her who she can and cannot spend time with, and insists that he needs to protect her and that he's doing these things out of love.  Manipulation and total control is NEVER okay and it's NEVER okay to justify those things by saying that they're because of love.  Ever.  Throughout the entire first book/movie Edward questions how Bella feels about everything and contradicts her.  Toward the end, Bella tells him that she wants to be a vampire, too.  Understandable.  Edward says "Is it not enough just to have a long and happy life with me?"  It's just a backwards way of the typical abuser phrase "If you really loved me..."  We're promoting abusive relationships by allowing him to treat her this way and justify it because he loves her.  

     I could go on and on.  There are plenty of things wrong with these stories, and plenty of reasons why we shouldn't be giving them to 11-year olds.  If I had to choose, though, these are my biggest issues with these books.  

     Again, I want to say that as a story, Twilight is fine.  I can enjoy a good love story as much as the next person (I'll even enjoy a bad love story), but these books are not appropriate to teach our children with.  I know that people will disagree with me, and that's fine.  I'm not telling anyone how to raise their kids, as clearly I don't have any of my own.  These are my opinions and views and if you disagree, that's absolutely alright.  Please try to keep any comments constructive.

Feminist Friday - Not For Women

I'm trying out this new weekly or bi-weekly (or monthly, depending on whether or not something has irritated me) feature on the blog called "Feminist Fridays".  I was raised in a very liberal home, with very feminist values and it's a big part of who I am.  This is my blog, and sometimes I want to rant about sexism and misogyny and homophobia.

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(As a disclaimer, nothing about my use of the worse "men" and "women", or anything similar, in this article imply any kind of gender binary conformation.  I'm trying to use simple words that are easily understood and related to.)

I think I'm a little late jumping aboard this train, but I blame my lack of television for the past 5 months.  If you have yet to see the new Dr. Pepper ad campaign, click here and watch it right now.  I will wait.  Ready?  Let's continue.

Let me just say that this absurdity is not only offensive to women (wait?  I'm not allowed to drink this?  I should just stick to rom coms and leave the action movies for the guys?) but it's also offensive to men, just like most male-targeted ads.  My friend Tim made a good point saying that Dr. Pepper is offensively stereotyping their prime target market.  What good is that going to do them?  Dr. Pepper has established (rightly or wrongly) what makes a person a "man". (I could go into a whole discussion about gender identity and such, but that's another topic.)  This soda company feels that they have the right to not only tell women what beverages they are and aren't allowed to drink, but also to tell men how they should present themselves in order to be seen as "real men".  Who says all "real men" drink beer, play pool, watch action movies, and have throngs of similar beer-drinking, pool-playing, action-movie-watching friends?  What about the men that drink water, are terrible at pool, prefer foreign films, and mostly hang out with women?  Are they not allowed to drink Dr. Pepper 10 because they aren't "manly" enough?  This ad severely implies that appearing "girly" is the worst possible thing and something that every guy out there should worry about and shame other men about.

One of my other huge problems with this, is the serious enforcement of the gender binary.  "Men" have to be macho, strong, super men (no crying, fellas) and "women" cannot be any of those things.  There's no room in between for macho ladies or sensitive men, or those folks who don't fit in to any of these categories.  I realize that it's just a soda company, but Dr. Pepper is reinforcing everything that LGBT+ groups have been trying to move past for years.  

I've had a lot of people tell me that "it's just a joke" and I "don't get what Dr. Pepper is trying to say."  I assure you, I get it.  Dr. Pepper is trying to tell men that their new low-cal soda is more manly (and therefore more appealing) than traditional diet sodas.  I definitely get it.  But I definitely don't think it's funny.  I think it amplifies the fact that for decades women haven't been able to make their own decisions and do the same things that men can do.  Now we're not allowed to drink the same soda?  We've gone leaps and bounds since the days before women's suffrage, but we still have quite a ways to go until women are really treated equally in society.  Even as a joke, Dr. Pepper telling women that they aren't allowed to do something just emphasizes this fact.

There are loads of products out there that successfully target to only men, or only women.  The difference is, none of these companies are telling anyone they aren't allowed to buy products aimed at the opposite gender.  There are numerous commercials for "women's" products (I use quotations because none of these products, in fact, can determine what a "woman" is) - perfume, makeup, tampons - but NONE of these advertisements tell men that they aren't allowed to purchase these products, with the exception of feminine hygiene products, which require certain anatomy that most men don't have.  (Notice - some men do in fact have this anatomy, and do purchase these products.)  

Similarly, there are plenty of products that are targeted strictly toward men - cologne, Viagra, beer - But, again, I haven't seen one Axe or Old Spice commercial (as misogynistic as they might be) telling me that I'm not allowed to buy their product because I'm a woman.  Hell, I could even use Viagra if I really wanted to, but it wouldn't have the same effect (and is actually harmful if you're pregnant, just so you know!) 

Really, the biggest problem I see with the Dr. Pepper campaign, aside from the absolutely terrible stereotyping of men, is that they are literally telling women what they are and aren't allowed to do.  Just for that, I'm going to go out and NOT buy a Dr. Pepper 10, not because they told me I can't, but because I don't really want to give this terrible company more money, and because I don't really like Dr. Pepper anyway.

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Feel free to leave opinions below - I'd love to read them!  But please, keep comments respectful and constructive.